Confession: I am not at all enjoying anything about Christmas this year.

Confession: Ok, I am trying to enjoy everything about Christmas, but am really, truly struggling.

I love Christmas. I love the twinkling lights, my tree and the ornaments new and old. I like baking cookies and designing and sending out my Christmas card. I like going to my mailbox and seeing the Christmas cards that come in the mail and listening to Christmas music. I’ve been listening to Christmas music since before Thanksgiving.

What I am not loving is the way my kids have been acting lately. Temper tantrums. Scratching of faces and pulling of hair. Yelling at each other and me. Their complete inability to help out in this house in any way at all. Fighting over every-single-toy that anyone touches. Slamming of doors.

Oh sure, they act like this all the time over the course of the year, but at Christmastime, it’s really, really rubs me the wrong way. I’m trying to convey Christmas cheer while gathering up the toys that they fling down the stairs, and am left wondering if I should return everything that I’ve gotten them because they truly don’t appreciate what they have.

We haven’t overdone any Christmas type events. We went to see Santa, just the kids and I, last week. We’ve been to one holiday party. All our other free time is taken up with hockey. We haven’t even had time to go looking at holiday lights, unless you count coming back from the grocery store or the hockey rink as going to look at them.

Annie and Izzie started their school vacation last Friday and have spent their days completely trashing my house. Throwing toys. Emptying storage bins. Fighting. Screaming. Being so incredibly rude to me that the thought of spending one more day with them brings me to tears. I can’t bring myself to wrap any presents because I am feeling so Grinch-like about it all.

I am certainly not looking for the perfect, Norman Rockwell version of the holidays. That’s just a fantasy. But I would like to enjoy the next few days and prepare for Christmas without feeling like my heart is two sizes too small.


2 thoughts on “Confession

  1. i could have written this post, especially today. the kids have been off since friday. i have made the mistake of taking them out to retail places (for errands). in petco today the boy said he was going to buy a fish. when i said no, i got, and continued to get, attitude. really? like we need ONE more thing. i am over their attitudes and piginess and basic ideas of being entitled to every damn thing. and the constant bickering between the two of them. oy vey. really? i so wasn’t in the christmas mood anyway, but their attitudes are making it hard to even pretend.

  2. *sigh* At least it’s not just me. You know what I think it is? We’re too darn BUSY to enjoy the season. It’s difficult to get in the spirit when I feel like I have eleventy-million things to do.

    Also, my children are also being SO difficult. Gavin is crying 90% of the time (no joke), and Charlotte is hitting. The majority of my time is being spent breaking up fights. Nathan is screaming for cookies all day.

    Remember when the twins were first born and people said “it gets easier?” When does it get easier?!?!? 🙂

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