I’ve hit that point where I’m getting overwhelmed. Overwhelmed with the the commitments, with the laundry, with everything. I shouldn’t be sitting here writing, as the washing machine just beeped and there are at least five more loads I need to do.
It’s the need-to-do part of my life that gets to me. I need to grocery shop. I need to do laundry. I need to get kids to the bus, from the bus, to preschool, from preschool. The need-to-dos overwhelm the want-to-dos and it is crushing sometimes. I want to sit and read one of the books I have stacked on the table next to the couch. And I do read, but not until nighttime after everyone is in bed and I’m beyond exhausted and have nothing left to give. I want to upload pictures from cameras and edit them and send them to print with time to spare instead of the last minute way I always do it. But the need-to-dos are always there, in the background, reminding me that the want-to-dos come later.
I wonder when the want-to-do part of my life will be something more than fleeting. The want-to-do part taunts me sometimes, because it’s right there for me to grab and I just can’t quite reach it. Not today at least. There’s laundry to be done.